To bench flash the ECU you only need +12 volts, Key on 12 volts, Ground and signal wire connected.

Blue Pin 19 IGN +12V Pink wire- key on.
Blue Pin 20 +12V Orange wire - OBDII port 16
Blue Pin 60 Ground Black White Stripe - OBDII Port 4 and 5. 
Blue Pin 59 VPW Serial Data Green to OBDII Port 2.

In the picture above orange is constant 12 volts.  Yellow is key on.  Black is ground and green is serial data.

Above are the connections to your HP Tuners ODb2 port.  Center two are ground.  Green is serial data.  Red is constant 12 volts.

From the view of the HP Tuners cable (not the ODB2 port on the vehicle) this is where you connect the wires.